fredje8v
Part of things
96 Daihatsu Atrai
Posts: 186
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;D ;D can't stop laughing. A mate of mine had a peugeot 205 convertible with a fuel pump wired directly from the battery with a switch. He left it on one night, to come in the next morning, seeing the battery dead, and all the cilinders filled with fuel. So he took the starter pack, got the spark plugs out, and wanted to start the petrol out. Unfortunately he forgot to unplug the ignition, BIG firebal was the result, he jumped out of the car, but the fire made the wires of the starter melt, it shortened the starter, while the car was still in gear. The car went starting and drove itselve outside of the workshop onto the road while still burning Luckily someone dove in to get it out of gear, so we can put the fire out with an extinguisher, quite a funny sight tho, to see a car going on it's own while burning ;D ;D
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pbottomley
Posted a lot
If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isnt for you
Posts: 1,135
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Ohh whilst I remember a mate of mine who has the nick name "Dangerous", a man who poked himself in the eye whilst putting on a pair of safety glasses!!!
His best effort (to date) was to swap a clutch on his GT and forget to put in the clutch arm, after swearing a lot he pulled the engine and gearbox back out again and re fitted the Arm, then lowered it back into the car (several days work here) only to find he had put the release bearing back in backwards!!!! ;D ;D ;D ;D PMSL laughing for days over that one
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I bought some rs alloys for my old mk5 cortina, and as I didn't want my parents to know (was still living at home, trying to save for a place to rent) I drove to the local supermarket to fit them - I had no idea you needed special nuts, I just used the stock ones - I managed to get about half a mile before people were beeping and pointing at my car, so I pulled over and the rear wheels fell off, wedging themselves in the arches. I did that too only I lost a wheel. Took my mate out for a hoon and we were doing 60 up a hill when the steering went all loose, wheel came off and we scraped down the road on the bottom of my TCA. Had a bit of trouble getting the car off the ground because it was so low but got the weel back on and drove back to university ;D Also met a local hotrodding buddy in the process who'd seen what happened and I've been mates with him for years now ;D
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Ahh, this is brilliant! How can I top that? I know it's not strictly car related, but still vaguely amusing... I observed this while working at a farm fairly recently ;D Volvo 240 estate, rotten and ready for scrappers. They lifted it up on a loader to get it on a trailer and *thud*. Tractor and loader is on its nose through overbalancing... ouch. But all was not over! No. Then a brain-dead lad, after fitting a new rear tractor tyre, forgot to check if it was seated right. Started inflating it with the compressor, and sat down on the tyre with the hose in his hand. And of course, the tyre suddenly seated itself, trapping his between the rubber and the rim. He squealed a little bit... ;D
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"A Pierburg carb? It would be more economical to replace it with a funnel..."
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The dim aprecntice once over-filled the oil in a motorhome by about half a litre. He owned up and asked what he should do, and was told the only way to remove the excess was for him to keep dipping the dipstick and wiping it on a rag till the level had dropped down to the max mark. He spent his whole lunch break dipping and wiping and still hadnt got the level down ;D
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1986 Panda 4x4. 1990 Metro Sport. 1999 Ford Escort estate.
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jikovron
Part of things
mechanical chaos
Posts: 633
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i had a chain of FAIL
I stripped and cleaned the 32dir on my old volvo 340,,,i even took the butterflys out,,however on reasssembly i didnt pein the ends of the choke flap screws and one came loose and got sucked in which made like a loud pinking noise
i then bought a renault 5 engine thinking it would go in to replace the 1400 (well it did with loads of bits swapped from the volvo 1400) i then notice on the test drive that it lacked quite alot of go hmm thats rather odd further adjustments didnt make any diference then after checking the engine code,,,,,,,,,,C1E meant that i'd fitted a 1.1 litre engine AAARRGGHHHH
anyhow it was reliable until the instagasket on the sump let go and dumped the oil on the motor way
so i learnt from that and bought a c3j 1390cc engine for it,,,
not over yet,,,,,,the propshaft fell of after it shimmied forward on its splines and then started whacking the floor before just falling of on the road (in the middle of northumberland
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We're encouraged to bring our cameras in to college to keep a record of what we're working on. It also allows us to take photos like this when the NVQ Motor mechanics kids don't lock the rails in place properly on the 4 post lift, when lowering a car off its wheels.... ;D Even more unfortunately than all of us having our cameras there, it was the one girl in their class who was responsible for it. Cue much curse word taking from her class mates...
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1989 Peugeot 205. You know, the one that was parked in a ditch on the campsite at RRG'17... the glass is always full. but the ratio of air to water may vary.
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Got struck under a jag once taking the autobox out, got it unbolted and lay under it to pull it back off the engine and lowered it down onto my chest, when i went to roll it off me i realised the car wasn't jacked up high enough and it hit the trans tunnel, didnt have the leverage on my now bent arms to lift it up again cos it was bloody heavy so i had to lay there for a while until i got rescued. :S
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Volvo back as my main squeeze, more boost and some interior goodies on the way.
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tri
Posted a lot
Posts: 2,572
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Got struck under a jag once taking the autobox out, got it unbolted and lay under it to pull it back off the engine and lowered it down onto my chest, when I went to roll it off me I realised the car wasn't jacked up high enough and it hit the trans tunnel, didnt have the leverage on my now bent arms to lift it up again cos it was bloody heavy so I had to lay there for a while until I got rescued. :S Epic.
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I forgot how to retro...
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In the 70s a mate of my dad who was a plumber was a VW enthusiast and had a beetle and a VW camper that he parked outside his house on a hill. One night he had a late callout, left the house with his toolbox and got in the beetle which was parked in front of the camper. He drove down the hill and stopped at some lights. Soon enough he spotted someone driving down the hill towards him from behind with no lights on. He watched it get closer and faster until it rammed him from behind and pushed him into the middle of the junction. He jumped out and ran round to find his own camper van had rolled down the hill behind him and hit him. He'd obviously forgotten to put the handbrake on and it had been resting against the back of the beetle.
Charlie
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I have also knocked myself out while trying to free a stuck alloy wheel with a club hammer, missed the wheel and hit the tyre and managed to club hammer myself right in the forehead, dunno how long i was out, but i had a big square bruise on my head for about a week.
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Volvo back as my main squeeze, more boost and some interior goodies on the way.
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I used to live in the Yorkshire Dales and was lying under a properly jacked and blocked Triumph 2000 concentrating on making a template for some welding, when a low flying RAF Tornado blasted over, startled I jumped up, banging my head on the car floor, which made me leap back, banging my head on the concrete drive, which made me jump up, banging my head on the car floor etc..... I managed to get my hands in the way before I battered myself to death. I now wear a hat when under cars.
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74 Mk1 Escort 1360, 1971 Vauxhall Victor SL2000 Estate.
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i went to help a mate out,it was raining and in his panic to complete the service on his car he took all the plug leads off and couldnt remember where they went,while i was refitting them he decided to try and start it.next thing i remember is laying on the verge looking up at him........
The local mot station tried to test a reliant robin,with a pit and not a ramp.you can guess the rest ;D ;D ;D
when i first started in the motor trade i had already wised up to the black light bulbs,long weights and left handed screwdriver but i still managed to get caught out.all VW spark plugs used to have the part number on so instead of looking up the correct p/no i just looked on the old plug,cept this time the mecahnics had been hiding round the corner with the oxy acetelyne heating the curse word up,and i went and picked it up,i don't know what was worse,the pain or the smell of buring fingers.
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redgt2
Part of things
praise the lowered!
Posts: 863
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forgot to tighten back wheel up more than finger tight after fitting coilies...tightened the other 3...
was impressed that i made it 100 miles up the motorway before wobble and faint thuddin noise made me pull over and save the day....
would have probably heard something was up sooner if it hadnt been for some loud metal (music)...lol
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BiAS
Club Retro Rides Member
Insert witty comment here
Posts: 2,231
Club RR Member Number: 147
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screw ups while fixing your carBiAS
@cheeqi
Club Retro Rides Member 147
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Taking a torque converter out of a 500SEC, laid underneath it, undo, rotate, undo, rotate etc until I tried to rotate it to get to the next bolt without realising I'd already removed them all. Cue torque converter getting bigger very quickly before smashing my head into the concrete drive.
Another SEC, I was setting the ignition timing with a strobe light and wasn't paying attention. Manual said something like 12' at 2000rpm, every I brought the timing marks to anywhere near that the revs would drop off so I was gradually turning the revs up. It was only when my mate noticed the reflection of the glowing exhaust and burning sound deadening in a puddle of water under the car that it occurred to me that the 12' degree mark I was aiming for was after TDC. Some top speed jacking up and hose pipe work put paid to the fire before the whole car went up but the smoke was proper nasty.
When I worked at a lawnmower servicing place the owners favourite trick was to leave charged up condensors on the metal work bench and ask you to pass them to him.
Trying to undo the crank pulley nut on a Rover 600, bouncing up and down on 4ft of scaffold tube over a breaker bar. Slipped off, scaff tube came up and hit me so hard in the knackers that I had to crawl to the house on my hands and knees.
Got out from under a car, there was a mini front subframe hung on the wall and the towers were about 3" lower than the top of my head. By the time my head made contact with them I had attained full standing up speed and came round sometime later looking up at it from the floor, had a headache and a cartoon style lump lump on my head for about a week afterwards.
Welding up my mates Mk1 Fiesta for him years and years ago, it was up on a 4 poster, I was gas welding next to the tank and he was up top on fire watch. I finished the welding, feeling quite relieved that that tank hadn't blown up when I looked over to the door of the unit and saw him standing there chatting to someone. I can remember looking up at the car and thinking, I'm sure that didn't have tinted windows...... by the time we'd got it down the back of the drivers seat, door card, rear quarter card, seat belt, headlining and a section of the car were all on fire.
Was at the scrappy with the same mate, stood on one car holding the bonnet up on the car above whilst he leant over the slam panel to get something out of the engine bay. It was raining and suddenly both of my feet slipped off the bonnet that I was stood on, in my surprise I must have forgotten to let go of the bonnet I was holding and he got hit on the head with the weight of me and the bonnet.
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(car+wheels)-rideheight=WIN
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qwerty
Club Retro Rides Member
Posts: 2,410
Club RR Member Number: 52
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This thread is HILARIOUS!
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Many years ago, my uncle was servicing his mk2 Jag - the full works, leads and everything. After he finished it wouldn't start. Enlisting the help of my father, they started to push the car to see if it would bump start. No dice. A few more of their mates were enlisted, and the pushing went on ad nauseaum. Still nothing. By the time they decided to give up there were about 8 guys pushing and they had shoved the car over 2 miles.
"Ok boys take a breather" says my uncle. Reaches into his pocket for what he thought was his lighter. 1 x Jaguar rotor arm.
He never told them for years!
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Years ago I was removing the bootlid from a Series VI Minx. I didn't think through the removal of the spring-loaded hinges. Undid one of them and it shot out and hit me square on the chin. Not sure how long it was before I came to.
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63 Alpine Series III 69 Imp Sport 930 07 Golf V GTI 11 Freelander 2 (hers!)
70 Hunter Royal (scrapped), 78 Chrysler Alpine GLS (given away), 84 505 STi (sold), 01 206 1.6XR (sold)
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tux
Part of things
Fat Bloke
Posts: 417
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Accidentally pushing a car off the ramp in neutral, and the car goes for it, and you have to run like hell, to jump trough the open drivers side window and pull the handbrake ;D ;D ;D Or accidentally letting the car roll of the ramp and not catching it before it demolishes the garage wall! ;D
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Many years ago, my uncle was servicing his mk2 Jag - the full works, leads and everything. After he finished it wouldn't start. Enlisting the help of my father, they started to push the car to see if it would bump start. No dice. A few more of their mates were enlisted, and the pushing went on ad nauseaum. Still nothing. By the time they decided to give up there were about 8 guys pushing and they had shoved the car over 2 miles. "Ok boys take a breather" says my uncle. Reaches into his pocket for what he thought was his lighter. 1 x Jaguar rotor arm. He never told them for years! ROFL ROFL ROFL!!!!! done that before cranked cranked cranked and swore..........then swore lots more ;D
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once again rocking with 1117cc and 4 gears!
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