|
|
|
A mate and I once spent the entire morning disassembling the front left hand corner of car we'd borrowed from another department because we wanted to swap the front knuckle over so we could fit a suspect part and drive it up and down the rough road test track to make sure it didn't fall apart. First incident was when he decided to remove a wheel nut with a plug spanner - the nut got jammed in the socket and we had to punch it out with a screwdriver, which in turn knackered the nut. Eventually we got everything off, and offered up the part we wanted to fit....it was a RIGHT HAND part Spent the rest of the day rebuilding the front left, disassembling the front right, and then spent all of 15 minutes driving up and down the rough road.
|
|
1982 Mercedes 280TE
|
|
|
|
|
|
Blew an inner tail light on the Corvette. Pre facelift ones don't have removable lenses - you have to reach in through the aperture that is exposed when you remove the rear numberplate. I dropped the plate off but could only just about reach the edge of the housing and touch it. Got a friend down and he could only just about touch it too. Removed the reversing light so we could get a little closer and we could just get our hands on it. Started raining at this point so was getting quite wet. Certainly couldn't get at it from underneath where it was. Much fiddling later, managed to retract the housing enough so we could see the bulb. Unfortunately, the bulb came out without its contacts, leaving them stuck in the holder. Mashed those to pieces with a plier (had got stuck admist all the gunk), cleaned the holder out with some electrical spray then headed over to the motorfactors to find a suitable bulb. That done, got home, put the bulb in, replaced it in the housing and tested it. Worked perfectly. As it had before. We'd gone and done the wrong bloody side ;D Lesson learnt anyway, can now do both in under ten minutes
|
|
Last Edit: May 4, 2009 11:37:53 GMT by Lewis
|
|
moomin
Part of things
Posts: 772
|
|
|
Rebuilt a 2l for my scirocco over many weekends, after driving it 30 miles to work realised i'd only done the flywheel nuts up finger tight. Amazingly no damage occured. Same car after dropping the engine out forgot to put the c-clamps back on the manifold, thought it was a bit loud then the exhaust fell off
|
|
@toxicknobs
|
|
purplevanman
Posted a lot
Way too orangey for crows
Posts: 3,829
|
|
|
"Ok boys take a breather" says my uncle. Reaches into his pocket for what he thought was his lighter. 1 x Jaguar rotor arm. He never told them for years! Similair one some years ago, was pillion on mums bike, Honda 400/4, we stopped at a shop and then the bike wouldn't start. We looked at everything, kicked it, pushed it etc and then called the RAC. He did much the same with out success. After some time it was found that the kill switch, which was hidden under some handlebar muffs, was switched off!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
scirroco one brings back embarrassing memories...
me an a mate built a Holbay to put into the first mk2 sceptre, got it in but couldnt get the twin carbs to run right... old drunk fitter from removal firm out the back comes over to my mate and revs the titties off it whilst I'm in the house using the toilet, next thing I know I hear a whole load of swearing followed by a massive fight as my mate and this fitter kick off at each other big time.. split the two up and get the car started to see what wrong and it sounds to be knokcing like curse word... so my mate strips the bottom end in situ shells out.. no apparent damage.. takes off top of motor again no visible damage.. gives up has a breather for a few days and finally removes the motor.. then realise the flywheel is barely hanging onto the bolts.... hmm knew we had forgotten something
on hillman minx V there is a little drain pipe at the back of the manifold to aparently stop them flooding, one day mine kept flooding so came to the conclusion the thing was blocked, me being bright spark decide to run it up with the drain pipe remove and then get a rivet mandrel to poke the hole out.. you guessed it, never realised ther ewould be enough vaccumm to neatly pull the rivet out of my fingertips and straight into no3 cylinder.. cue quick head off to get it out.. sitting there car in bits when my mate comes in with magnet on a stick says "you coulda used this through the plug hole" doh...............
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
also have to confess to the hammer on a wheel and hitting the tyre one.. didnt knock myself out though but it was close as close can be..
car up on ramp once running, decide to be bright spark and scare the fitter (my work colleague) working on the other side by grabbing the rotating wheel and making his speed up, grab for tyre hoping to slow it enough to grab it and one of my fingers goes into a hole on the wheel trim... cue lots of blood and bits of skin....
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I spent two days this week taking the back axle out of a Jaguar XJS and replacing the brake discs. Put it all back together complete with new over axle exhaust pipes. Got it back under the car and started lifting it up into place the exhausts got hung up. I'd fed them out through the wrong hole in the subframe... so it all had to come out again.
Got the wrong wiring connector on a Jag for the fuel pump... spent two days trying to figure out why it wouldn't work (Jags have redundant wiring portions for the different variants - I'd plugged the pump into the unused fuel injection harness.)
Ric
|
|
"You're about as likely to come across a fully functioning old Jag, as you are a taxicab that smells agreeable." - James May
|
|
|
|
|
Me=18 year old and inexperienced car=Morris Minor
Did my first engine swap in my parents garage. All went well (considering) until it came to start up time. Car started OK but would not rev, and full choke helped only a little. I was skint, and so far had only cost me £20.
After 2 days of head scratching I bit the bullet and limped the car the couple of miles to our local mechanic. Returned later for the verdict, the car was running perfectly. I asked what the problem had been and the cost. The mechanic escorted me to the pub to explain all:
"You daft bu66er!!! You'd got the choke and accelerator cables mixed up and connected them to the wrong bits of the carb!! Now buy me a pint for my labours..................and a double Brandy to not tell anybody."
|
|
Sing along everybody. "Sala-cadoola-metcha-caboola-bibbity-bobbity-boo!"
|
|
Tim
Posted a lot
Posts: 3,340
|
|
|
Trying to undo the crank pulley nut on a Rover 600, bouncing up and down on 4ft of scaffold tube over a breaker bar. Slipped off, scaff tube came up and hit me so hard in the knackers that I had to crawl to the house on my hands and knees. /WINCE!!! After all that, how are you still alive! Any car work i have done is under the watchful eye of someone else, so i havn't cocked anything up yet major, apart from: Undoing a sump but on a gearbox - sat at the front of the car, head level with front end, HEAVING on a socket - socket snaps, i headbutt the front end of the car hard (eye just missing the little ball join the headlight clips onto!) and bounce on to the floor, dazed and confused and wondering what the hell had just happened. But building bikles i've managed to: Slip with the spanner whilst removing a seized pedal and punch the chainring with full force (bike upside down)- I slowly lay down on the patio after that and got into the foetal position, holding my bleeding fingers between my legs, shuddering in pain, unable to do or say anything else - no major damage though, amazingly, but the pain was unreal! Take apart a set of suspension forks, clean, dissasemble rebound rod and shims, clean, put back together, put back on bike, test them out...and the fork legs came away as i had forgot to refit the circlips properly. I've also rebuilt a different set of forks (took forever to get the dampers and clips seated), and left half of the rebound assembly still sat on my workstand. I swore..a lot :-)
|
|
|
|
lae
Posted a lot
Posts: 1,045
|
|
|
One of the apprentices where I used to work had pulled the handbrake with the drum off, not realising that it would ajust the handbrake all the way out.
He came to me and said 'The drum is really tight'. I was busy with some paperwork and just mumbled 'give it a tap with a mallet' without even realising what he was asking.
Cue jammed rear brakes, and me fiddling for about half an hour with a couple of screwdrivers through the backplate trying to get it off.
We both got a bollocking for that one! Hardly fair as technically speaking I wasn't employed to work on the cars at all!
Oh yeah and almost forgot - one day my Datsun started making a horrendous squealing/grinding noise, I was about 2 mins from my mate's house so I pulled into his drive. He didn't have his trolley jack so I jacked it up with the widowmaker and pulled the wheel off.
I was about to put the wheel under the sill and my mate asked why. I stopped and said 'if it falls off the jack, it'll land on the wheel instead of crunching into the ground'.
Then I turned back and promptly bumped the car off the jack with the wheel.
|
|
Last Edit: May 6, 2009 12:44:32 GMT by lae
Currently: Mk1 Focus blandmobile
Formerly: 1969 MG Midget 1972 Avenger GT 1981 Datsun Cherry 1989 Corolla 1979 Mercedes W123 200D 1995 Ford Falcon 1996 Ford Telstar (bet you had to google that one)
|
|
|
|
|
|
I can only remember one stupid thing thats happened to me recently: working on my mates polo breadvan, I was undoing the bolts to take the alternator off from under the car, which were getting stiffer as they got looser (due to some surface rust). Got one to a thread where it got stuck, so got a longer spanner for more leverage. I put it on the bolt, pulled hard and the longer spanner touched the body and shocked me, making me drop the spanner which had of course loosened the final bolt and the alternator fell on my head, then bounced onto my hand! that was a bit painful We make sure to always remember to disconnect the battery now xD
|
|
|
|
Prud
Part of things
Posts: 308
|
|
|
I've discovered a Gemini (Kadett) will get to about a foot off the ground before the earth strap lets go. For some reason that lesson I keep forgetting. Picked up many cars by earth straps mid engine-swap.
I've also had an engine-less mini fall off axle stands and the front subframe landed on my toes. Adrenaline kicked in, pulled the mini straight up by the slam panel long enough for mates to throw a couple of tyres underneath it. Squished the steel caps good and proper...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I did a good one when I had a diesel escort van, was giving it a service and the last thing to do was change the oil. So under the car I went rushing like mad to get on and do other stuff, drained the oil and just poured in the 5 or so litres that the manual said it would need and went belting off down the road!
The first thing that I pointed to a mistake was the stupidly large amount the suddenly came pouring out the exhaust engulfing the cars that were behind me!
I learnt a valuable lesson that day that most cars use different transmission and engine oil! Had to buy 5 1 litre bottels of trans fluid (not the cheepest way to do it) to refill what I had drained thinking it was engine oil and then drain half of the (now 10 litres) of engine oil back out!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
some many thing making me giggle in this thread, well..
I was under my mx5 undo'ing the exhaust cat pipe for mot time, slipped with the 12mm spanner and cut just above my eye. That hurt! The usual thing is one we have an engine on the crane hangine over the engine bay, I sit down on the crane legs, roll a fag to think about how we are planning to create the mounts and without thinking stand upright, really need to stop doing that as I smack me head everytime on the crane OUCH!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Couple of mine:
I was re-fitting the cylinder head to an engine that I was putting together, and just torquing down the bolts when there was a bang.
I thought b"ugger - I've broken the bolt". But then notice that it's still intact. Hmm. Can't see any problems, so decide to ignore it. and carry on.
Next day, after a 6-hour engine swap, I'm filling the cooling system, and I can hear a dripping noise. As it turns out, I'd cracked the block across the bottom of the bolt - massive amounts of coolant leaking and the head not pulled down properly. Cue re-fitting the original engine.
The car also has an '80 electronic ignition unit on it, with a switch to choose between electronic, conventional and 'static timing'. In the static timing position it won't run. The number of times I've forgotten to turn it back on...
Also heard of a mechanic at my local garage driving a Rolls onto the ramps. He just gives it a little blip of throttle to get it over the lip of the ramps and the car disappears through the back wall of the garage - he had no idea of the power of the thing.
|
|
|
|
Siert
Posted a lot
Posts: 1,104
|
|
|
I got myself into a small accident today, one that could have ended a lot worse, and thought about this thread later, so I'll beter post it... I was working at my car club's workshop and intended to put some tectyl rust protection stuff in my recently welded sills. We have a compressed air powered spray gun specially made for that purpose, it has a nice hose at the end to slide into the sill. I connected the air, slided the hose into the sill, put the tectyl bottle under it... damn, I don't have the ring to seal the bottle to the spray gun... So, I literally ask the guy standing next to me; "will this work without, or will it just spray the stuff in our faces...". We didn't use our brains and decided on "Nah, will be fine"... I got loads of tectyl in my face, but luckily it seems I closed my eyes in a reflex... sticky eyelids are annoying but not really a problem. Once I got my face reasonable clean I noticed my hair was stuck so badly together that for a while I thought I would just have to cut it all... fortunately I managed to save it in the end
|
|
|
|
The Doctor
Club Retro Rides Member
Posts: 3,435
Club RR Member Number: 48
|
|
|
i luckily only have minor screw ups, i ALWAYS forget to add the bumpstop when i swap springs. And since i did almost all springs from the Dutch Starlet club i did a LOT of them twice, because the car dropped on the tires and then i spot the bumpstop... i think i have done it 15 times now, and always forget the stupid things
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reading this in bed with my pregnant girlfriend, I've just been informed that our child is never, EVER gonna be allowed to help me tinker on my car Still, we're both laughing and wincing through this thread
|
|
|
|