If you don't want to read this post (TL:DR) skip right to the end
Her washing machine picked a great time to decide to pack up Sunday bloody morning and it's not playing ball- it's not doing anything at all and it has a belly full of wet washing so it didn't need feeding.......
Everything I know about washing machines is documented below
So we can establish that it's not a lot - I don't even know what stuff the buttons do - they just do stuff
I do know that you mustn't mix colours with whites - 6 bras that went from white to a nice pink with a brand new red T-shirt edumacatted me on that score - I said Pink was a girly colour but apparently only until you are seven...... I also learnt that this error is as unforgivable in a relationship as having an affair!!!!
So even though I hate the disposable culture of today's society and try like to fix stuff when it broken to save the environment (Not to save money) I went looking for a new one on line (apparently she had 3 loads of washing waiting and it wasn't going to do itself........ and I was curse word about on my PC...... I kept quiet)
However with suppliers shutting up shop left right and centre wasn't sure how quickly I could actually get one delivered..... I know freezer shortages are an issue but how long before people realise they can also store food in washing machines??? It's a strange world we live in right now........
Also it's a washing machine there are loads of them on the market - how the curse word am I supposed to know what spec I need!!! If it was a car I'd know exactly what I needed (well actually wanted and needed even if I didn't) I asked her what's important in a washing machine - she replied that it works is critical....... I know that tone all too well......
So I googled the fault and in the course of the rabbit hole that is google I found out how to fault code read a washing machine (can you believe it's a curse word thing!) press some buttons and you get some flashing lights which can be translated into fault codes
This essential research had downsides
Apparently me on my PC wasn't wasn't fixing her washing machine (I did try to explain but as usual fixing is a process of action - apparently I take it apart with no idea on the problem and find broken part, fix broken part and normal service is resumed absolutely no knowledge is required it's a man thing that needs no training.......)
Anyway armed with some knowledge I went to see what this clever piece of italian engineering could tell me
I pressed buttons and it bleeped and flashed it's lights at me
A voice from the other room said - "I've already pressed all the buttons it's not doing anything why don't you just fix it"
Trying to keep a lid on it "Yes darling - just getting it to tell me what's wrong"
"I already know what's wrong it's bloody broken and if you think it's going to talk like R2D2 you need sectioning again" - not sure if she really said again or if it was my paranoia but either way that was the jist of her reply (for some reason I think the pressure of several loads backed up was getting to her - constipation possibly??)
So I did me some fault code reading and got a code which suggested blocked waste or jammed pump
so checked the waste - all good
checked the pump - no bra wires jammed in the pump for a change (Anyone know why the wires don't want to stay in the bras???) - bit of detritus in there (scale and solid lumps of soap powder and lint) - ran fine when tested
Bear in mind all this was carried out without any disasembly - apparently that wasn't fixing it........
Did the fault code thing again (honestly it's a curse word thing!!) and got a different code - Motor this time - google said likely to be brushes........
Removed from it's home under the worktop
Removed top and back panels
This met with approval as clearly I was now doing some real fixing
Stripped motor out removed brushes - checked - worn but only 50%
Now 50% worn meant that the motor was a bit mucky apparently when you have white kitchen cupboards, kettle and fridge it's not wise to make a cup of tea........... who knew a little carbon dust could spread so far it looked like scenes of crime had been in (again)
Put it all back together and fault coded again (I curse word you not it's a curse word thing!!!) This time "Pressure switch" fault
So I pulled of the tube and sucked and blew on the pressure switch all good - made the right sort of noises and held a vac and couldn't be blown thro
Sucked on the tube - yuck - still ingesting a bit of soap powder residue never killed anyone - I've guzzle the odd mouthful of petrol over the years and I can confirm petrol tastes better.........
Shot some water down the tube to give it a rinse - the drain trap was still open so mopped up the spillage on the floor
And did the code reading thing (I know - you all knew it's a curse word thing right!!!!) This time I got another code that said door switch
Google said it's switch or wiring
Pulled the door switch out and it's bloody hot - pulled the thing apart and it all looks a bit crusty and chared
Googled the part number found a genuine one on that bay of excrement for £16 and free post or express delivery at £6 extra - I took the express option
Apparently curse word about on your PC while the washing machine was in bits wasn't fixing it..................
At this point on Sunday "WE" still have a broken washing machine and one of us has loads backing up - I suggested the local river and a few rocks but it was declined as not clean enough - I was going to point out what I had ingested from inside the washing machine but thought better of it
Got home tonight and it's here so fitted it and slapped it all back together
Did the fault code thing (Washing machines have fault codes - no biggy!!!!) no faults
It's now doing a nice 95 deg wash as what I also found in my googling is that the pressure switch pipework can get blocked with soap residue if you constantly wash at low temps and an occasional high temp wash with minimal detergent can help keep things clean
TL:DR
Fixed the curse word thing (Handy when a washing machine can tell you what's stopping it from washing with a fault code I'm sure everyone knew this)
I'm also now convinced more than ever that washing machines are female and here is my logic
When there is a problem and you ask it what is wrong you don't get the right answer until at least you've asked the question at least four times
If anyone thinks Mrs BC is a difficult person she's not she's a lovely person - challenging but lovely
Constipation can be a real curse word so give her some slack
Her washing machine picked a great time to decide to pack up Sunday bloody morning and it's not playing ball- it's not doing anything at all and it has a belly full of wet washing so it didn't need feeding.......
Everything I know about washing machines is documented below
So we can establish that it's not a lot - I don't even know what stuff the buttons do - they just do stuff
I do know that you mustn't mix colours with whites - 6 bras that went from white to a nice pink with a brand new red T-shirt edumacatted me on that score - I said Pink was a girly colour but apparently only until you are seven...... I also learnt that this error is as unforgivable in a relationship as having an affair!!!!
So even though I hate the disposable culture of today's society and try like to fix stuff when it broken to save the environment (Not to save money) I went looking for a new one on line (apparently she had 3 loads of washing waiting and it wasn't going to do itself........ and I was curse word about on my PC...... I kept quiet)
However with suppliers shutting up shop left right and centre wasn't sure how quickly I could actually get one delivered..... I know freezer shortages are an issue but how long before people realise they can also store food in washing machines??? It's a strange world we live in right now........
Also it's a washing machine there are loads of them on the market - how the curse word am I supposed to know what spec I need!!! If it was a car I'd know exactly what I needed (well actually wanted and needed even if I didn't) I asked her what's important in a washing machine - she replied that it works is critical....... I know that tone all too well......
So I googled the fault and in the course of the rabbit hole that is google I found out how to fault code read a washing machine (can you believe it's a curse word thing!) press some buttons and you get some flashing lights which can be translated into fault codes
This essential research had downsides
Apparently me on my PC wasn't wasn't fixing her washing machine (I did try to explain but as usual fixing is a process of action - apparently I take it apart with no idea on the problem and find broken part, fix broken part and normal service is resumed absolutely no knowledge is required it's a man thing that needs no training.......)
Anyway armed with some knowledge I went to see what this clever piece of italian engineering could tell me
I pressed buttons and it bleeped and flashed it's lights at me
A voice from the other room said - "I've already pressed all the buttons it's not doing anything why don't you just fix it"
Trying to keep a lid on it "Yes darling - just getting it to tell me what's wrong"
"I already know what's wrong it's bloody broken and if you think it's going to talk like R2D2 you need sectioning again" - not sure if she really said again or if it was my paranoia but either way that was the jist of her reply (for some reason I think the pressure of several loads backed up was getting to her - constipation possibly??)
So I did me some fault code reading and got a code which suggested blocked waste or jammed pump
so checked the waste - all good
checked the pump - no bra wires jammed in the pump for a change (Anyone know why the wires don't want to stay in the bras???) - bit of detritus in there (scale and solid lumps of soap powder and lint) - ran fine when tested
Bear in mind all this was carried out without any disasembly - apparently that wasn't fixing it........
Did the fault code thing again (honestly it's a curse word thing!!) and got a different code - Motor this time - google said likely to be brushes........
Removed from it's home under the worktop
Removed top and back panels
This met with approval as clearly I was now doing some real fixing
Stripped motor out removed brushes - checked - worn but only 50%
Now 50% worn meant that the motor was a bit mucky apparently when you have white kitchen cupboards, kettle and fridge it's not wise to make a cup of tea........... who knew a little carbon dust could spread so far it looked like scenes of crime had been in (again)
Put it all back together and fault coded again (I curse word you not it's a curse word thing!!!) This time "Pressure switch" fault
So I pulled of the tube and sucked and blew on the pressure switch all good - made the right sort of noises and held a vac and couldn't be blown thro
Sucked on the tube - yuck - still ingesting a bit of soap powder residue never killed anyone - I've guzzle the odd mouthful of petrol over the years and I can confirm petrol tastes better.........
Shot some water down the tube to give it a rinse - the drain trap was still open so mopped up the spillage on the floor
And did the code reading thing (I know - you all knew it's a curse word thing right!!!!) This time I got another code that said door switch
Google said it's switch or wiring
Pulled the door switch out and it's bloody hot - pulled the thing apart and it all looks a bit crusty and chared
Googled the part number found a genuine one on that bay of excrement for £16 and free post or express delivery at £6 extra - I took the express option
Apparently curse word about on your PC while the washing machine was in bits wasn't fixing it..................
At this point on Sunday "WE" still have a broken washing machine and one of us has loads backing up - I suggested the local river and a few rocks but it was declined as not clean enough - I was going to point out what I had ingested from inside the washing machine but thought better of it
Got home tonight and it's here so fitted it and slapped it all back together
Did the fault code thing (Washing machines have fault codes - no biggy!!!!) no faults
It's now doing a nice 95 deg wash as what I also found in my googling is that the pressure switch pipework can get blocked with soap residue if you constantly wash at low temps and an occasional high temp wash with minimal detergent can help keep things clean
TL:DR
Fixed the curse word thing (Handy when a washing machine can tell you what's stopping it from washing with a fault code I'm sure everyone knew this)
I'm also now convinced more than ever that washing machines are female and here is my logic
When there is a problem and you ask it what is wrong you don't get the right answer until at least you've asked the question at least four times
If anyone thinks Mrs BC is a difficult person she's not she's a lovely person - challenging but lovely
Constipation can be a real curse word so give her some slack