Tales of the Volcano Lair - Tractor Fun

[stealthstylz]

The PCSO story is ace, thought it was just me that had been dealing with their stupidity - sure the police round here have stuck a bat signal up except instead of a Batman logo it's a overweight man stood next to a coffee machine scratching his curse word.

"Release the desk staff"

My favourite so far is the one who visibly got a adrenaline rush after he asked why I appeared to be in a rush, and I replied "I've got 2 dead bodies in the back and they're gonna start smelling if they stay out in this heat".

I could see his eyes go and heart beating through his stab vest as I popped the tailgate to reveal 2 of Aldis finest large chickens along with the rest of the weeks shop.

[Frankenhealey]

Len Scroggins – A Coil Maker’s Story

A Short Biography by Frank N. Healey, BA, PHd (Bombay) and Bar

From the series ‘Unsung Hero(es/ines) of BMC History’

Len's life up to his early twenties is shrouded in mystery but what is known is that in the 1950's he discovered Anarcho-Syndicalism and made it his life's work to promote this left of left wing political philosophy to the detriment himself and to nearly everybody he met. To Len, Pol Pot and Mao Zedong were both dangerous right wing demagogues.

In the early sixties Len was working at Lucas making ignition coils for Austin Healeys, amongst other marques, and not making much headway on the dictatorship of the proletariat. Surprisingly for someone who knew it was necessary to bring down the corrupt capitalist system in order to rebuild a Syndicalist workers paradise, Len made the most reliable coils on the Lucas production line. He felt however that he needed a larger stage for his political evangelism and left Lucas in 1966 for the newly formed British Motor Holdings.

Len's politics led to him rapidly becoming a shop steward but his constant clashes with other union officials and his accusations of their “capitalist-running-dog-ism” and their “revanchist Wilsonian Labourite so-called socialism” led to his exclusion from the steward's committee. The defining moment in Len's life was at one of those 523 walkouts and strike meetings in 1978-79 period at Longbridge where the Union was promoting its acceptance recommendation for the latest management offer.

The Works Convener addressed the crowd, loud hailer in hand, with "Brothers, the Steward's Committee recommends this final management offer as follows

1. Every man will be on a basic £5,000 per year (remember it was the late 1970's)
2. Any overtime will be at double time
3. There will be 8 weeks paid holiday a year
4. Up to six months full sick pay each year
5. A new Leyland car for all workers every six months (Allegro probably)
6. Free canteen and Xmas club
7. The automatic right of any or all of your children to work for BLMC"

After a short pause he said "And finally Brothers, on the major sticking point of the last three meetings with the bosses, the working week will be reduced to solely Wednesday afternoons!"

"I'd like a show of hands on this Brothers but first, I must ask, are there any questions?"

The assembly went quiet as the level of management capitulation finally sunk in.

The stewards scanned the crowd and saw a single hand raised.

Reluctantly the man with the megaphone announced "Brother Scroggins you are recognised" and then
"Brother Scroggins what is your question?"

Len annunciated in a clear Black Country accent "You say that we only have to work Wednesday afternoons?"

"Yes" said the chief steward impatiently "What is your question?"

Len smiled knowingly, realizing that everyone was hanging on his every word and said

"WHAT!!! Every f*cking Wednesday afternoon?"

Len was finally rescued from the ensuing riot by undercover police and has led a quiet life since. He currently lives in Eastbourne and votes Conservative. His Lucas HA12 coils are highly collectible.

Coming soon ‘Doris, the Phantom Tea Lady of Cape Works – Myth or Murder?’
and ‘Einstein, the Healey Drawing Office Cat – Did he design the AH100?’

[Frankenhealey]

[Frankenhealey]

Oop t'top field to do a bit of bracken bashing with my trusty bodyguard. He's there to stop me being mugged by the sheep, the Guinea Fowl or in extremis, a gang of hooligan bunnies



Trouble is that after an hour there's nothing left on the temp gauge but the maker's name. TVO tractors need to run hot but not that hot.



Back to the Volcano Lair and the heady delights of 12mph top speed blast down the bypass cools her down a bit. Switched over to petrol for the 200 yards up Cowsh1t Lane and she kept cutting out. Fuel vaporisation? Possibly but didn't feel like it so got her into the workshop. Switched off and the needed to be a bit closer to the wall started again and realised the starter motor was still spinning. Disconnected battery and hoiked out the starter switch. This dinosaur is actuated from the gear lever and you must not drop the linkage into the transmission case else you are in a world of woe.

The offending item



The linkage retaining lash-up



Was welded together



Lucky I had a spare



Bolted it up and all was good and didn't lose the linkage. On to fuel problem and it was cutting out cold so it's a fuel problem unless it's the coil but lete's look at the 65 year-old fuel system first as the coil is only 2 years old.

The fuel bowl was pretty sh1tty but that's its job










Emptying the fuel tank





The possible culprit! The petrol banjo has lost its brass gauze filter but the TVO one is fine. New one ordered.



While the tank is off and being cleaned better look at the rest of the fuel system. Had to cut the corroded exhaust clamp off to get the silencer off so I can get the exhaust shroud off.







Carb looks like it could do with a clean so took it to work and put it through the big ultrasonic cleaner





Carb back on



New toolbox fitted. It's an ammo box as suggested by comfortablynumb but even better as I shot the ammo from it.



With all this the fuel problems are currently sorted.

I sold some car bits to fund some new tractor toys. First off was a PTO log splitter. Is this dangerous or what?





Bit lucky on a misspelled Ebay ad and scored a set of NOS 3-point linkage forks with the only bid. Needed a road trip to pick them up.



The accessory park



Now all I need now is a trailed Bamlett finger bar mower and I think I'm finished for this year unless a good Massey baler comes up

[igor]

Was that mower designed for use behind a team of horses then later butchered to be compatible with a tractor?

[Phil H]

Why does most farm machinery look like it could be straight out of a medieval dungeon?

Especially that log splitter..

[Deleted]

That’s any Constipation issues sorted then....🤣🤣
Or if you don’t feel like going out and buying any overpriced tat during this COVID-19 malarkey,you can stay at home and rip yourself a new one...🤣🤣

[dodgerover]

Nothing wrong with the proper Fergy finger mower or hedge cutter as long as you go nice and steady, give s lovely cut when not suffering 80 years of wear and neglect.
Unfortunately ours is suffering approx 60 years of neglect and is siezed solid.

Will that log splitter work ok with the live drive on the Fergy?

[Frankenhealey]

Jul 3, 2020 22:01:16 GMT igor said:

Was that mower designed for use behind a team of horses then later butchered to be compatible with a tractor?

Possibly

Jul 4, 2020 6:40:22 GMT Phil H said:

Why does most farm machinery look like it could be straight out of a medieval dungeon?

Especially that log splitter..

Because it does. Check out



and similar

Jul 5, 2020 20:53:52 GMT dodgerover said:

Nothing wrong with the proper Fergy finger mower or hedge cutter as long as you go nice and steady, give s lovely cut when not suffering 80 years of wear and neglect.
Unfortunately ours is suffering approx 60 years of neglect and is siezed solid.

Will that log splitter work ok with the live drive on the Fergy?

It should do. Look out for upcoming video where I train the grandchildren to feed it while I sit on a lawn chair and drink San Mig.


The Bamlett (which I haven't bought) would be great for clearing this as it would clog the topper toute suite



I'm going to have to be very careful because the local Leporidae-cong have extensive tunnel works. Probably boobytrapped as well



Also I have to avoid this tumulus (scheduled monument)



This weekend as lockdown has been eased we have been inundated with shed draggers, campers and the rest of the unwashed hordes I've decided I need a decent Tedder for my bypass jaunts so I can give them a proper countryside experience that they so obviously crave. Not a chance of overtaking me then

[flyingphil]

Jul 3, 2020 21:41:14 GMT Frankenhealey said:

Oop t'top field to do a bit of bracken bashing with my trusty bodyguard. He's there to stop me being mugged by the sheep, the Guinea Fowl or in extremis, a gang of hooligan bunnies



Hi Ian
I didn't realise that tractors needed wheelie bars.....but then I thought...yours may well be needed!

[darrenh]

ive got a few rings of chestnut in the back yard that might send some of those log splitters (or the users) into critical mass. i don't know the parlance but its the bits where bows or limbs come out of the main trunk and the grain goes in 2 directions.

[Frankenhealey]

It's a bit of a multi-part catch up

BAD ANIMALS

During lockdown I was inveigled into some woodworking projects for the benefit of the wimmin' of the family. YouTube has a lot to answer for and particularly those videos referring to shabby-chic planters made from pallets and both the girls wanted one.

First 'acquire' some reasonable wood from work



Much cursing, splinters, some beer drinking and head-scratching with a chippy's pencil behind my ear and the first one was finished 4 hours later



The second was just two hours to finish so on that geometric series I should be knocking them out in 0.03 seconds now. Zeno's Paradox anyone?



Cuprinol'd and planted out with strawberries.



On the strength of this SWMBO got down the huge leather-bound tome of 'Jobs for Frankenhealey to do'. Next up on the list was new floor in the Horsebox of Doom. 50 years of horse, sheep and pig pee had taken toll on the hardwood floor.







I'm halfway through the job and I hear a terrible squeal. Now my canine companion is also in the Field of Dreams and the last time I looked was practising his stalking skills on his ungulate friends



I get up, race round the horsebox and there's Ol' 144 standing over Bob the Dog, she's obviously headbutted him in the torso and BtD is on the ground coughing up blood. It's the second Sunday of lockdown, there's not a snowball's chance in hell of getting a vet out sharpish and it's DEFCON 1 if he's got a punctured lung. PDSA clinic is 12 miles away and trying to lift him into the Defender would be a bad move. I scare off 'Ol 144 and get back to BtD who is now whimpering but not coughing. We've relaxed to DEFCON 2 because I notice the blood is due to him biting his tongue. I didn't know until then that dogs could bite their tongue. I feel his side and apart from general soreness he does not seem to have anything seriously wrong. I ring the vet service and they concur that it's probably shock and soreness but they'll be out tomorrow to double check. I decide to try a little canine psychology to rush into the house for a Jumbone.

He managed to crawl a few feet across the grass, wolfed down the treat and then spent the next half hour stick chipping to work out his frustration



Reasonably assured of the dog's health I finished off the horsebox



The rest of the menagerie approved



Resting up after my exertions with a small libation and some crisps who should turn up but the miraculously cured Greater Purbeck Snack Hyena.



Next up : SAD ANIMALS

[vitesseefi]

"Greater Purbeck Snack Hyena"

[georgeb]

Jul 9, 2020 21:26:38 GMT Frankenhealey said:

Give yourself another small libation for your extensive role in BtD's miraculous recovery!

[Phil H]

Everything is magically better when there’s snacks in the offing..so confirm my pair of snack-hounds.

[theoldman]

Jul 9, 2020 21:26:38 GMT Frankenhealey said:

 

That's the shabby cracked.

When are you starting on the chic?

As long as your wimmin are happy, life's good.

Virtual ham bone for BtD incoming when I can find one.

[dodgerover]

Got a friend for Bob the dog here, she's not quite so food orientated though. Can't keep her away from any type of water though as she loves swimming




The golden one however will eat until she is sick, then go back and look for more given a chance!

[MiataMark]

Jul 9, 2020 21:26:38 GMT Frankenhealey said:

Reasonably assured of the dog's health I finished off the horsebox

Do like a BtD story.

I've replaced the floor in a couple of horseboxes (trailers), getting the old floor out is horrible if you start to think about what it's soaked in... The first one I did I got some old conveyor belt to put down on top of the wooden floor.

Later boxes with metal floors are much better..

[dodgerover]

Conveyor belt works well, stops the horses slipping about as well as providing a little cushioning, our original stuff was ex NCB, not sure where you might get some from these days.
On the positive side hardwood floors take a long time to rot away. If you can regularly lift the belting and let the floor dry it does help, as does trying to make sure the trailer is watertight or stored under shelter so the floor isn't permanently wet.

[gtviva]

No good at linking pictures but going back to the "Leporidae-cong" the burrow looks big for wabbits? if it is wabbits they make a nice stew! If its our black and white striped friends they may take a different approach...

I can recommend the old acrobat hay turner, nice and simple, nothing to go wrong really apart from broken tines which are still available, ours was about 30mins away and again it was going to the scrap man so I went over in our then Vauxhall Zafira, tool case in hand, took the wheels and frame apart then stuffed the lot into the Zafira, job done!

Glad to see BtD is OK!